Goodbye September

September has been the most overwhelming and stressful month of the year. I usually adore September, I always see it as a fresh start, a new chapter, especially as Autumn starts to creep in.

However, this month wasn’t easy. Settling into my new internship was intense and at times I felt like I wasn’t cut out for being a full time writer, but thankfully I’ve eased into my editorial intern role.

During the second week of the month my Mam was taken to hospital. It was the most horrifying experience ever. My mam is the strongest and bravest women I know, she managed to pull through and is finally home after spending eleven lengthy days in hospital. My Mam never fails to surprise me. She was in intensive care two weeks ago and now she’s sitting on the sofa giving out about the state of the jumper Ryan Gosling wore on Graham Norton, “He must have bought that jumper in Guineys.”

I always try my best to look on the positive side of things and even though September was full of horrible days, it was sprinkled with a few joyful moments.

On the first day of my internship there were dogs in our office, it was quite possibly the best welcome I could have ever dreamed of.

There’s a little café near my office that sells Badger and Dodo coffee, which is my all time favourite.

My middle sister’s sense of humour was the one thing that brought light to hospital visits. Her witty jokes made everyone feel that little bit better and brought a smile to my face.

I only read one book this month, but that book made this stressful month bearable. I spent lunch breaks and Luas journeys reading How To Stop Time by Matt Haig. I have so much respect for Matt Haig and his work is one of a kind. How To Stop Time was an exciting and emotional and thought provoking read. I spent three weeks getting to know main character Tom Hazard and his story. It also features appearances from Shakespeare and F.Scott Fitzgerald so it was always going to be a winner in my eyes.

Sweater weather is here! I’ve already started expanding my knitwear collection. I love Autumn fashion, I cannot wait until it get’s cooler so I no longer feel bad about spending half my pay cheque on jumpers and cardigans.

And finally, Taylor Swift released two new songs and even though they are extremely different to her Fearless days, I love them. I cannot wait for her album release in October.

Always look on the bright side of life.

Sincerely Yours,

Kat

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My End of Year Goals

I know it’s been an entire month since I last posted here, but I have a very good excuse. I promise!

I got an internship… an editorial internship. The past three weeks have been overwhelming, but I finally feel like I’m starting to settle in at the office. I’m getting used to the style guide, I know how to write headlines that’ll catch your attention and I can edit photos properly (the other day I spent five minutes looking for photos of Ryan Gosling, what a dream.)

There are so many things I adore about my internship, from the fact that I have my own desk to the never ending supply of sweet treats that are in the office, and from being able to say I write for a living and the fact that I get Friday and Saturdays off. I just had to take some time out of my day off to say hello again. I have missed my blog, even though I write every day in work.

Life has been pretty good since I started my internship. I’ve been feeling less anxious and haven’t suffered from any bouts of depression in such a long time, it’s an odd but incredible feeling. My mind is clear and I feel really determined. I’ve even set some goals for the remainder of the year.
 

  • Complete reading challenge- I’m currently reading How To Stop Time by Matt Haig. It is incredible. It’s full of history and heartache and mystery and F.Scott Fitzgerald is in it, so obviously it’s won me over.
  • Go on a holiday- I need to travel again soon. The wanderlust bug won’t leave me alone. I don’t care where I go, whether that’s down to Cork for a weekend of rambling around the glorious city or ideally to Paris where I’ll eat way too many pastries and channel my inner Blair Waldorf
  • Get a second tattoo- It’s been two years since I got my semicolon tattoo. I am itching to get another one. I’ve been thinking of getting a little flower, a forget-me-not to be exact, above my left wrist.

I think it’s important to remember that goals don’t have to be grueling, tedious tasks. Setting goals that will improve your life and make you feel happier is an essential.

And on that note I’m off to ring the Revenue to talk about tax and pretend to be a grown up. Sometimes we just have to tick the dull things off our to-do- lists to make room for the more thrilling tasks.

Sincerely Yours,

Kat

A Letter To My 18 Year Old Self

Dear 18 Year Old Kat,

Everything got better.

You’ll discover many things in your final year of secondary school. You’ll drink for the first time, kiss people, go to house parties and spend Saturdays wandering around the city. You’ll also fight with people, and fail class tests and feel low, but I promise it get’s better.

You passed your Leaving Cert. You got that B in English that you dreamed of thanks to a hell of a lot of reading and a little chat with Ms. Munnelly. That conversation outside the R.E room gave you back your spark. You fell out of love with writing, but don’t worry, it came back. Hold onto how you felt when it was announced to the class that your short story was the best, scoring 99%.

Your mind will be full of troublesome thoughts for quite some time, please don’t suffer in silence. Tell your parents. Tell your class tutor. Go see a counsellor. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Depression is common. Counselling will help, I promise.

Ignore the people who mock you for being shy. Being an introvert is part of who you are. You’ve yet to discover who you really are, but you will, and she’s not the worst person ever. Don’t let someone’s negative view of you impact your self esteem. I know it’s easier said than done, but you’re worth so much. Remember that.

Value the time you spend with your friends. You will meet some great people during your time in school, but friendships fall apart and people fight. Treasure every moment you have with these people. Dance at house parties. Ramble around the city centre. Wander around the local parks. Sit by the canal and natter about everything and anything. Waste your money on McDonald’s. Oh, and don’t be ashamed to talk about Glee, that show may have been cheesy, but it made you smile.

Please stop straightening your hair. Your brown curly hair is one of your best features. Also, you’re going to dip dye your hair blonde. Everyone will tell you it’s looks great, but trust me it’s hideous, please never do that again.

Stop arguing with your parents. Your Mam and Dad are two of the most amazing people on the planet. Tell them you love them every single day. Spend as much time with them as possible. Bring them out for dinner when you have the money. They have taught you so much and will support you every step of the way, even when you drop out of college.

Yes…  in the future you’ll drop out of your Level 8 course, and it’ll be terrifying, however it’ll be one of the best decisions you’ll ever make. Don’t worry, you’ll find your feet and discover two wonderful courses that you’ll adore. You’ll become features editor of your college newspaper too, and have work published, yes, really!

You’re going to fall in love. You’ll feel content and bright and merry. You’ll go on dates and mini holidays and share many kisses. Ignore the mushy rom-coms, love is complicated and stressful. Hugh Grant and Colin Firth will not have a fight over you, I’m sorry. You’ll suffer through a great heartache and a painful breakup, but I promise it’s not the end of the world. Your heart feels happy and full again.

Do the things that make you happy. I know it’s a cliche, but please follow your dreams. Write every single day. Read as much as you can. Go to the movies and to the beach and to bookstores and cafes by yourself, it’s scary but trust me it’ll help build your character. Be goofy and embrace your pasty pale skin. Buy coffee from local cafes, because Starbucks may seem cool but their coffee tastes like dishwater. Go on holidays with your dearest friends, even if you’re struggling with money. Learn how to use a washing machine and eat more fruit. Visit your grandparents more. Drink water on nights out if you want to. Stay away from cigarettes. Wear whatever makes you feel confident, even that silly bowler hat you’re currently obsessed with.

Remind yourself that the dark days aren’t permanent, things will get better, I promise.

Sincerely Yours,

22 year old Kat.

 

 

Coffee for One

There is something so comforting about watching the world go by with a warm mug of coffee in your hands.

I’m a true introvert so I adore spending time by myself. It calms me down and gives me the time to be alone with the dozens of thoughts whizzing around my mind.

I love peaceful mornings when I’m alone in the kitchen, waiting for the kettle to boil as I try and decide which mug I want to use (a very important decision) for the first cup of coffee of the day.

Visiting my favourite cafe on a rainy afternoon fills me with waves of contentment. Sitting by the window with a cappuccino in one hand and a book in the other is one of the greatest feelings.

Buying a takeaway cup of coffee at Heuston Station before boarding a train to the countryside makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Curling up on my bed as the rain pours down outside makes me feel calm. The warm glow of the fairy lights brightens up the room and a mug of coffee sits next to a vase of peonies on my bedside locker.

I love ordering coffee for one. Solitude and coffee is the perfect combination.

Sincerely Yours,

Kat

6 Things That Made Me Smile This Week

I was lucky enough to take part in a mindfulness workshop in college on Wednesday. One thing that helps boost mindfulness is gratitude, so I’ve decided to start a positivity journal. I’m toying with the idea of visiting Paperchase and splashing out on a new notebook *swoons*, but today I’m going to scribble here on my blog and share a few things that made me smile like the Cheshire Cat this week.

1: My Mam minds my little cousin Molly three days a week. She brightens my mornings and never fails to make me laugh. She’s such a placid kid and is a joy to have around the house. This week she ran around the house doing dinosaur impressions, which made me laugh so much.

2: I handed up my special subject assignment, which has been stressing me out for months. It’s one of the biggest college projects I’ve ever worked on so I was over the moon when I handed it up on Tuesday afternoon.

3: Riverdale is back. I am crazy about this show so that two week break was a true struggle. Oh it’s so great to see Jughead back on my screen. I’ve got the biggest crush on Cole Sprouse.

4: Twist and Shout by The Beatles played on the radio as I drove to college with my Dad. That song always makes me smile because it reminds me of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

5: I bought new denim shorts that make me feel really body confident. I struggle to find shorts that fit well because I’ve got huge hips and a slim waist, but finally I found a pair that make me feel super sassy.

6: My skin is clearing up. Bon voyage spots! I’ve been drinking more water, eating more fruit and using the L’oréal Fine Flowers Gel-Cream Wash and it seems to be working on my angry red blemishes. It feels good to have clear skin again.

What made you smile this week?

Sincerely Yours

Kat

2015 Highlights: The Cheshire Cat Moments

It’s almost time to say goodbye to another year and hello to a brand new one. 2015 was a roller coaster year for me. There were many low points, but a tonne of wonderful moments. I wanted to look back and share some of the great memories with you because I am all about those positive vibes. I won’t let the bad parts of 2015 rule over the good ones, so here are some of my top moments of 2015 that made me smile like the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland.

Meeting Rae Morris. I adore Rae Morris. She is my favourite female singer and she is one of my inspirations as a writer. Her album Unguarded is one of my all time favourites so it’s safe to say I was ecstatic when she announced her Dublin gig earlier in the year. I couldn’t believe I’d get the chance to see her live. I headed to her gig at the Academy along with my best friend Shell and it was beyond flawless. I was completely mesmerized for the entire set. To top it all off Rae had a meet & greet at the end of thee night. I still pinch myself I when I look back at the photos of us. I met one of my idols, a dream come true!


Dundalk Adventures. Long distance friendships are tough. My two best friends live in different counties so I rarely ever get to see them which isn’t the best. However, I’ve been super lucky this year and I’ve been able to visit my best pal Shell so many times. From the unforgettable (literally) Hudson Taylor gig to Tesco adventures, from huge McDonald’s orders to beach trips. I feel so happy to have such an amazing best friend and being able to spend time with her made this year ten times better. Here’s to more gin drinking and out of tune sing alongs in 2016.


Women’s Mini Marathon. Back in June I took part in the VHI Women’s Mini Marathon with my friend Hazel. We raised money for the Irish Cancer Society which is a charity that holds a very special place in my heart. It felt amazing to do something fun that would benefit others. Raising money for charity has become a big part of my life so I was so proud for completing the marathon. The best thing was taking part in the marathon in honour of my loved ones that passed away. Thinking of them kept me going throughout the day.

Devon. I love the United Kingdom. I feel more at home there than I do here in Dublin. I’ve visited both the north and south of England and Wales over the past few years and have fallen in love with each and every place I’ve been to. However, this summer I spent two weeks in Devon which is one of the most beautiful and calming places. From early morning hikes along the Jurassic coast to strolls around the town in the afternoon, I loved every single moment. It was during this holiday that I truly felt like I had defeated my depression. It helped me get back on track and I even started writing again during this trip. I hope to live over in Devon at some point in my life because I love that place with all my heart.


Graduation. I’ve always loved writing. I remember spending lunch time in primary school working on my stories and writing a book about a kangaroo named Jack. This September I graduated from my creative writing course which was a huge achievement for me. To make the day even better the ceremony was held at the Irish Museum of Modern Art which is one of my favourite places in Dublin. My parents came along with me which was so special because their support means so much to me. The best part of the day was embracing my inner Judd Nelson and fist pumping the air with my two favourite pals Jamie and Alan.


Molly Ringwald and Ally Sheedy. Breathe Kat, just breathe… This moment… oh wow! It means the world to me. If you know me you’ll know that I am hopelessly in love with The Breakfast Club. That film means the world to me and shaped me as a person. It made such a big impact on  my life and inspired me as a writer (thank you John Hughes). 2015 marked the 30th anniversary of The Breakfast Club’s release so there were numerous interviews with the cast to mark the event. E News were hosting a Q&A with Molly Ringwald who plays Claire and Ally Sheedy (my queen) who plays Alison. I jumped at the chance when I spotted the tweet from E News asking fans of the film if they wanted to ask the pair anything. I was hopeful and prayed they’d answer my question or at least acknowledge me, but I didn’t wanna get my hopes up so I carried on with my day. The next morning I was scrolling through my notifications when I spotted one from Instagram… “E News tagged you in a video” well sweet merciful jesus I leapt out of the bed and jumped up and down and screamed as if there was no tomorrow. I couldn’t believe it. They answered my question. Molly Ringwald and Ally Sheedy the stars of my all time favourite movie answered MY question. As you can tell I’m still gobsmacked and incredibly excited about it. It still feels like a dream!



Hannah’s Visit To Dublin. Hannah is one of the most important friends I’ve ever had. Simple as that! I would be lost without this girl, but unfortunately she lives miles away from the Big Smoke so I rarely get to see her. However, when she told me she was visiting Dublin I was over the moon! We had the sweetest little day, from chats over tea to visits to dinky little bookshops. It was heavenly. I cannot wait for more days like this with this wonderful little redhead that I adore. We both went through hell and back this year, it was an absolute nightmare at times but I will always look back on this day and smile like the Cheshire Cat. (Hannah, if you’re reading this I love you and thank you for helping me so much this year. I’m glad we defeated poophead and voldemort together hehe)

Happiness. It wouldn’t be a true Scribbles and Shortcake post without me getting all deep and sentimental now would it? The start of 2015 was a nightmare for me to be brutally honest. My doctor diagnosed me with mild depression and anxiety earlier this year after a number of bad life events, the main one being a truly harsh break up that I didn’t think I could get through. I genuinely didn’t think I’d make it to the end of this year and in all honesty I was in such a bad way I didn’t want to. I was just completely done with life. I was distraught, I was so completely heart broken that at one stage I wouldn’t eat or talk or shower or leave the house, I just stayed in bed all day. However, slowly but surely the dark thoughts faded away and the bad days started to decrease. This is thanks to my incredible and supportive friends and family who helped me in unbelievable ways. I fought through the tough days and surprised myself with how strong I really am. I didn’t give up on college or my passions or life. I kept going. I’ve finally reached the point where I am 100% better again. I never ever thought I’d get to this point and I am so crazily happy with life again. I’ve got so many ideas and plans for the new year. I’ve got so many things I want to achieve, places I want to visit, films I want to watch, songs I want to dance to and people I want to meet. There’s so much I want to do! I’ve got a brand new 365 days! 365 days I didn’t think I’d ever see. One thing this year taught me is to never ever give up (I may be singing Rick Astley’s hit song in my head right now) no matter how hard things are. There’s nothing better than looking back at how far I’ve come over the past year. I’ve found my true self, made incredible memories, made new friends and visited new places.

 There’s so much more to come in 2016 and I truly cannot wait for the new year. I’m starting a brand new year as the best version of me.

So here’s to a happy and healthy 2016 for one and all. Make the most of every single day and appreciate every moment.

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

Kat

Dear July

I recently discovered an achingly beautiful series on YouTube called ‘Letters To July’ on Emily Diana Ruth’s channel. It is without a doubt one of the most stunning and intriguing series I have come across online. I couldn’t fault it at all. The videos are so honest, so fresh and so real. I would highly recommend you check out the series over on Emily’s channel https://www.youtube.com/user/emilieofnewgloom

Thanks to Emily’s enchanting series I have been inspired to write my very own letter to July. July was a month that I was anxious about. I didn’t know what to expect or how I’d feel throughout this month. I believe every month is a fresh start. July was another new chapter. And one I surprisingly enjoyed and adored. So here’s my letter to you, July.
Dear July,
I was nervous about meeting you this year, part of me hoped we wouldn’t meet again.When we last met I was the happiest I’d ever been. I was hopelessly in love and felt like life couldn’t possibly get any better. However, since then a lot has happened and a lot has changed. Sometimes life isn’t particularly kind to us. I discovered that the hard way this year, July. From heartache to illness to deaths to family fall outs.When life turns bad it’s hard to remember the good times and it’s extremely hard to look forward and feel excited about the future. In the middle of the Spring I remember turning to a friend and telling her about how much I was dreading this summer. I was terrified about meeting you again. I spent an unfortunate amount of time feeling broken and lost this year. There were days where I was angry for waking up.I was angry about being alive. I was so close to breaking point, July. I lost who I was and part of me lost the will to live. I never thought that feeling would go away. I expected to meet you with tears rolling down my cheeks and a broken heart. I didn’t think I was capable of moving forward, not without the person who once held a special place in my heart the last time we met, July.
However, when we met I was happy, genuinely happy again. The dark clouds had faded and were replaced by sunshine and calm blue skies. My head was no longer clouded with dull thoughts. I didn’t dread meeting you like I did back in the Spring. I was excited. I couldn’t wait for a new month, a new chapter. July, you’ve been the best chapter yet. A chapter full of smiles, full of laughter, full of warmth, full of new music, new people, new hobbies and new places. A chapter spent with some of the most beautiful and important people in my life. A chapter full of bright, blue skies. A chapter full of moments I will treasure forever. A chapter where I became me again, an even better me. A chapter where I got back on my path. A chapter where my life got better.
I’m glad I didn’t give up on you, July. It was a privilege. I’ll see you again next year.
Sincerely Yours,
Kat