It recently dawned on me that my anxiety no longer controls me. It still rears its ugly head from time to time, but it isn’t weighing me down like it used to.
I realized that I’ve gotten quite good at managing the disorder. There are little tricks that help me cope with it, but recently, I noticed that there’s something else that has helped me massively.
I often pushed people away when my anxiety was extremely bad. I’d spend most of my time alone and to be quite honest, I got too comfortable with being by myself.
I still love my solo adventures, but those trips never leave me feeling as happy as I do after I spend time with my friends.
I’m not sure if my friends realize, but their company alone has helped me beyond belief.
My mind is no longer clouded with those negative, heavy thoughts but with fond memories like…
The day we watched old Grey’s Anatomy episodes and ugly cried into those blankets that always ruin my leggings.
The time I jumped and squealed and made a show of you in the Tesco car park when you surprised me with George Ezra tickets.
The night outside Bar Rua where we sang along to Wagon Wheel in the smoking area.
That day in Dun Laoghaire when we strolled along the pier and spoke about just how overwhelming our new ‘adult lives’ are.
That moment we both shrieked with delight on Dawson Street when we realised we both fancied you know who.
The never-ending chats at the tea station about everything from whether or not we should have a biscuit to those big life-changing decisions we’re slightly scared to make.
The glorious Cork adventure where Matty Healy fell in love with me (and not you), “share with the group.”
The time we sat at the train station with a blanket over us like two little grannies.
The evening where I instantly fell in love with Domhnall Gleeson after he walked past the wine bar we were in.
The moments when we snook over to our beloved coffee corner to escape from customers and natter about Once Upon A Time.
That night in Rome when we sat outside with giant glasses of rosé and spoke about past loves and our career goals.
The silent disco in Galway where we danced like absolute mad women until 3am.
To my friends, thank you.
Thank you for putting up with my wacky ways, my fascination with the royal family, my dreadful singing and my never-ending rambles about how dishy Harry Styles is.